No More Learning

LYSISTRATA. To begin with, we shall not see you any more running like mad
fellows to the Market holding lance in fist.

A WOMAN. That will be something gained, anyway, by the Paphian goddess,
it will!

LYSISTRATA. Now we see 'em, mixed up with saucepans and kitchen stuff,
armed to the teeth, looking like wild Corybantes! [427]

MAGISTRATE. Why, of course; that's how brave men should do.

LYSISTRATA. Oh! but what a funny sight, to behold a man wearing a
Gorgon's-head buckler coming along to buy fish!

A WOMAN. 'Tother day in the Market I saw a phylarch[428] with flowing
ringlets; he was a-horseback, and was pouring into his helmet the broth
he had just bought at an old dame's stall. There was a Thracian warrior
too, who was brandishing his lance like Tereus in the play;[429] he had
scared a good woman selling figs into a perfect panic, and was gobbling
up all her ripest fruit.

MAGISTRATE.
And how, pray, would you propose to restore peace and order
in all the countries of Greece?

LYSISTRATA. 'Tis the easiest thing in the world!

MAGISTRATE. Come, tell us how; I am curious to know.

LYSISTRATA. When we are winding thread, and it is tangled, we pass the
spool across and through the skein, now this way, now that way; even so,
to finish off the War, we shall send embassies hither and thither and
everywhere, to disentangle matters.

MAGISTRATE. And 'tis with your yarn, and your skeins, and your spools,
you think to appease so many bitter enmities, you silly women?

LYSISTRATA. If only you had common sense, you would always do in politics
the same as we do with our yarn.

MAGISTRATE. Come, how is that, eh?

LYSISTRATA. First we wash the yarn to separate the grease and filth; do
the same with all bad citizens, sort them out and drive them forth with
rods--'tis the refuse of the city. Then for all such as come crowding up
in search of employments and offices, we must card them thoroughly; then,
to bring them all to the same standard, pitch them pell-mell into the
same basket, resident aliens or no, allies, debtors to the State, all
mixed up together.