No More Learning

[1] This office was usually undertaken by the Boots, who found in it
a refuge from the Baker's constant complaints about the insufficient
blacking of his three pair of boots.

This also seems a fitting occasion to notice the other hard words in that
poem. Humpty-Dumpty's theory, of two meanings packed into one word like a
portmanteau, seems to me the right explanation for all.

For instance, take the two words "fuming" and "furious. " Make up your mind
that you will say both words, but leave it unsettled which you will say
first. Now open your mouth and speak. If your thoughts incline ever so
little towards "fuming," you will say "fuming-furious"; if they turn, by
even a hair's breadth towards "furious," you will say "furious-fuming";
but if you have that rarest of gifts, a perfectly balanced mind, you will
say "frumious. "

Supposing that, when Pistol uttered the well-known words--

"Under which king, Bezonian? Speak or die! "

Justice Shallow had felt certain that it was either William or Richard,
but had not been able to settle which, so that he could not possibly say
either name before the other, can it be doubted that, rather than die, he
would have gasped out "Rilchiam! "


Fit the First.

_THE LANDING. _

"Just the place for a Snark! " the Bellman cried,
As he landed his crew with care;
Supporting each man on the top of the tide
By a finger entwined in his hair.

"Just the place for a Snark!
I have said it twice:
That alone should encourage the crew.
Just the place for a Snark! I have said it thrice:
What I tell you three times is true. "

The crew was complete: it included a Boots--
A maker of Bonnets and Hoods--
A Barrister, brought to arrange their disputes--
And a Broker, to value their goods.

[Illustration: "SUPPORTING EACH MAN ON THE TOP OF THE TIDE"]

A Billiard-marker, whose skill was immense,
Might perhaps have won more than his share--
But a Banker, engaged at enormous expense,
Had the whole of their cash in his care.

There was also a Beaver, that paced on the deck,
Or would sit making lace in the bow:
And had often (the Bellman said) saved them from wreck,
Though none of the sailors knew how.

There was one who was famed for the number of things
He forgot when he entered the ship:
His umbrella, his watch, all his jewels and rings,
And the clothes he had bought for the trip.

He had forty-two boxes, all carefully packed,
With his name painted clearly on each:
But since he omitted to mention the fact,
They were all left behind on the beach.

The loss of his clothes hardly mattered, because
He had seven coats on when he came,
With three pair of boots--but the worst of it was
He had wholly forgotten his name.

[Illustration: "HE HAD WHOLLY FORGOTTEN HIS NAME"]

He would answer to "Hi! " or to any loud cry,
Such as "Fry me! " or "Fritter my wig! "
To "What-you-may-call-um! " or "What-was-his-name! "
But especially "Thing-um-a jig! "

While, for those who preferred a more forcible word,
He had different names from these:
His intimate friends called him "Candle-ends,"
And his enemies "Toasted-cheese.