'Tis right well conceived for you women, for every wench's hole
will be occupied; but as regards us poor men, you will leave those who
are ugly to run after the handsome fellows.
will be occupied; but as regards us poor men, you will leave those who
are ugly to run after the handsome fellows.
Aristophanes
The ugliest and the most flat-nosed will be side by side with
the most charming, and to win the latter's favours, a man will first have
to get into the former.
BLEPYRUS. But we old men, shall we have penis enough if we have to
satisfy the ugly first?
PRAXAGORA. They will make no resistance.
BLEPYRUS. To what?
PRAXAGORA. Never fear; they will make no resistance.
BLEPYRUS. Resistance to what?
PRAXAGORA. To the pleasure of the thing. 'Tis thus that matters will be
ordered for you.
BLEPYRUS.
'Tis right well conceived for you women, for every wench's hole
will be occupied; but as regards us poor men, you will leave those who
are ugly to run after the handsome fellows.
PRAXAGORA. The ugly will follow the handsomest into the public places
after supper and see to it that the law, which forbids the women to sleep
with the big, handsome men before having satisfied the ugly shrimps, is
complied with.
BLEPYRUS. Thus ugly Lysicrates' nose will be as proud as the handsomest
face?
PRAXAGORA. Yes, by Apollo! this is a truly popular decree, and what a
set-back 'twill be for one of those elegants with their fingers loaded
with rings, when a man with heavy shoes says to him, "Give way to me and
wait till I have done; you will pass in after me. "
BLEPYRUS. But if we live in this fashion, how will each one know his
children?
PRAXAGORA. The youngest will look upon the oldest as their fathers.
BLEPYRUS. Ah! how heartily they will strangle all the old men, since even
now, when each one knows his father, they make no bones about strangling
him! then, my word!
the most charming, and to win the latter's favours, a man will first have
to get into the former.
BLEPYRUS. But we old men, shall we have penis enough if we have to
satisfy the ugly first?
PRAXAGORA. They will make no resistance.
BLEPYRUS. To what?
PRAXAGORA. Never fear; they will make no resistance.
BLEPYRUS. Resistance to what?
PRAXAGORA. To the pleasure of the thing. 'Tis thus that matters will be
ordered for you.
BLEPYRUS.
'Tis right well conceived for you women, for every wench's hole
will be occupied; but as regards us poor men, you will leave those who
are ugly to run after the handsome fellows.
PRAXAGORA. The ugly will follow the handsomest into the public places
after supper and see to it that the law, which forbids the women to sleep
with the big, handsome men before having satisfied the ugly shrimps, is
complied with.
BLEPYRUS. Thus ugly Lysicrates' nose will be as proud as the handsomest
face?
PRAXAGORA. Yes, by Apollo! this is a truly popular decree, and what a
set-back 'twill be for one of those elegants with their fingers loaded
with rings, when a man with heavy shoes says to him, "Give way to me and
wait till I have done; you will pass in after me. "
BLEPYRUS. But if we live in this fashion, how will each one know his
children?
PRAXAGORA. The youngest will look upon the oldest as their fathers.
BLEPYRUS. Ah! how heartily they will strangle all the old men, since even
now, when each one knows his father, they make no bones about strangling
him! then, my word!
