No More Learning

I indignantly rejoined that, being an officer and a gentleman, I had
not been able to enter Pugatchef's service, and that he had not employed
me on any business whatsoever.

"How, then, does it happen," resumed my judge, "that the officer and
gentleman be the only one pardoned by the usurper, while all his
comrades are massacred in cold blood? How does it happen, also, that the
same officer and gentleman could live snugly and pleasantly with the
rebels, and receive from the ringleader presents of a '_pelisse_,' a
horse, and a half rouble? What is the occasion of so strange a
friendship? And upon what can it be founded if not on treason, or at the
least be occasioned by criminal and unpardonable baseness? "

The words of the officer wounded me deeply, and I entered hotly on my
vindication.

I related how my acquaintance with Pugatchef had begun, on the steppe,
in the midst of a snowstorm; how he had recognized me and granted me my
life at the taking of Fort Belogorsk. I admitted that, indeed, I had
accepted from the usurper a "_touloup_" and a horse; but I had defended
Fort Belogorsk against the rascal to the last gasp. Finally I appealed
to the name of my General, who could testify to my zeal during the
disastrous siege of Orenburg.

The severe old man took from the table an open letter, which he began to
read aloud.

"In answer to your excellency on the score of Ensign Grineff, who is
said to have been mixed up in the troubles, and to have entered into
communication with the robber, communication contrary to the rules and
regulations of the service, and opposed to all the duties imposed by his
oath, I have the honour to inform you that the aforesaid Ensign Grineff
served at Orenburg from the month of Oct. , 1773, until Feb. 24th of the
present year, upon which day he left the town, and has not been seen
since. Still the enemy's deserters have been heard to declare that he
went to Pugatchef's camp, and that he accompanied him to Fort Belogorsk,
where he was formerly in garrison. On the other hand, in respect to his
conduct I can--"

Here the General broke off, and said to me with harshness--

"Well, what have you to say now for yourself?
"

I was about to continue as I had begun, and relate my connection with
Marya as openly as the rest. But suddenly I felt an unconquerable
disgust to tell such a story. It occurred to me that if I mentioned her,
the Commission would oblige her to appear; and the idea of exposing her
name to all the scandalous things said by the rascals under
cross-examination, and the thought of even seeing her in their presence,
was so repugnant to me that I became confused, stammered, and took
refuge in silence.

My judges, who appeared to be listening to my answers with a certain
good will, were again prejudiced against me by the sight of my
confusion. The officer of the Guard requested that I should be
confronted with the principal accuser. The General bade them bring in
_yesterday's rascal. _ I turned eagerly towards the door to look out for
my accuser.

A few moments afterwards the clank of chains was heard, and there
entered--Chvabrine. I was struck by the change that had come over him.
He was pale and thin. His hair, formerly black as jet, had begun to turn
grey. His long beard was unkempt. He repeated all his accusations in a
feeble, but resolute tone. According to him, I had been sent by
Pugatchef as a spy to Orenburg; I went out each day as far as the line
of sharpshooters to transmit written news of all that was passing within
the town; finally, I had definitely come over to the usurper's side,
going with him from fort to fort, and trying, by all the means in my
power, to do evil to my companions in treason, to supplant them in their
posts, and profit more by the favours of the arch-rebel. I heard him to
the end in silence, and felt glad of one thing; he had never pronounced
Marya's name. Was it because his self-love was wounded by the thought of
her who had disdainfully rejected him, or was it that still within his
heart yet lingered a spark of the same feeling which kept me silent?