Guess cuts his shoes, and limping, goes about
To have men think he's troubled with the gout;
But 'tis no gout, believe it, but hard beer,
Whose acrimonious humour bites him here.
To have men think he's troubled with the gout;
But 'tis no gout, believe it, but hard beer,
Whose acrimonious humour bites him here.
Robert Herrick
GREAT BOAST SMALL ROAST.
Of flanks and chines of beef doth Gorrell boast
He has at home; but who tastes boil'd or roast?
Look in his brine-tub, and you shall find there
Two stiff blue pigs'-feet and a sow's cleft ear.
222. UPON A BLEAR-EY'D WOMAN.
Wither'd with years, and bed-rid Mumma lies;
Dry-roasted all, but raw yet in her eyes.
233. NO LOCK AGAINST LETCHERY.
Bar close as you can, and bolt fast too your door,
To keep out the letcher, and keep in the whore;
Yet quickly you'll see by the turn of a pin,
The whore to come out, or the letcher come in.
237. UPON SUDDS, A LAUNDRESS.
Sudds launders bands in piss, and starches them
Both with her husband's and her own tough fleam.
239. UPON GUESS. EPIG.
Guess cuts his shoes, and limping, goes about
To have men think he's troubled with the gout;
But 'tis no gout, believe it, but hard beer,
Whose acrimonious humour bites him here.
242. UPON A CROOKED MAID.
Crooked you are, but that dislikes not me:
So you be straight where virgins straight should be.
261. UPON GROYNES. EPIG.
Groynes, for his fleshly burglary of late,
Stood in the holy forum candidate;
The word is Roman; but in English known:
Penance, and standing so, are both but one.
_Candidate_, clothed in white.
272. UPON PINK, AN ILL-FAC'D PAINTER. EPIG.
To paint the fiend, Pink would the devil see;
And so he may, if he'll be rul'd by me;
Let but Pink's face i' th' looking-glass be shown,
And Pink may paint the devil's by his own.
273. UPON BROCK. EPIG.
Of flanks and chines of beef doth Gorrell boast
He has at home; but who tastes boil'd or roast?
Look in his brine-tub, and you shall find there
Two stiff blue pigs'-feet and a sow's cleft ear.
222. UPON A BLEAR-EY'D WOMAN.
Wither'd with years, and bed-rid Mumma lies;
Dry-roasted all, but raw yet in her eyes.
233. NO LOCK AGAINST LETCHERY.
Bar close as you can, and bolt fast too your door,
To keep out the letcher, and keep in the whore;
Yet quickly you'll see by the turn of a pin,
The whore to come out, or the letcher come in.
237. UPON SUDDS, A LAUNDRESS.
Sudds launders bands in piss, and starches them
Both with her husband's and her own tough fleam.
239. UPON GUESS. EPIG.
Guess cuts his shoes, and limping, goes about
To have men think he's troubled with the gout;
But 'tis no gout, believe it, but hard beer,
Whose acrimonious humour bites him here.
242. UPON A CROOKED MAID.
Crooked you are, but that dislikes not me:
So you be straight where virgins straight should be.
261. UPON GROYNES. EPIG.
Groynes, for his fleshly burglary of late,
Stood in the holy forum candidate;
The word is Roman; but in English known:
Penance, and standing so, are both but one.
_Candidate_, clothed in white.
272. UPON PINK, AN ILL-FAC'D PAINTER. EPIG.
To paint the fiend, Pink would the devil see;
And so he may, if he'll be rul'd by me;
Let but Pink's face i' th' looking-glass be shown,
And Pink may paint the devil's by his own.
273. UPON BROCK. EPIG.
