No More Learning

Broom and Miss Shovel together they sang,
"What nonsense you're singing to-day! "
Said the Shovel, "I'll certainly hit you a bang! "
Said the Broom, "And I'll sweep you away! "
So the coachman drove homeward as fast as he could,
Perceiving their anger with pain;
But they put on the kettle, and little by little
They all became happy again.
Ding-a-dong, ding-a-dong!
There's an end of my song.




THE TABLE AND THE CHAIR.

[Illustration]

I.

Said the Table to the Chair,
"You can hardly be aware
How I suffer from the heat
And from chilblains on my feet.
If we took a little walk,
We might have a little talk;
Pray let us take the air,"
Said the Table to the Chair.


II.

Said the Chair unto the Table,
"Now, you _know_ we are not able:
How foolishly you talk,
When you know we _cannot_ walk! "
Said the Table with a sigh,
"It can do no harm to try.
I've as many legs as you:
Why can't we walk on two? "


III.
So they both went slowly down,
And walked about the town
With a cheerful bumpy sound
As they toddled round and round;
And everybody cried,
As they hastened to their side,
"See! the Table and the Chair
Have come out to take the air! "


IV.

But in going down an alley,
To a castle in a valley,
They completely lost their way,
And wandered all the day;
Till, to see them safely back,
They paid a Ducky-quack,
And a Beetle, and a Mouse,
Who took them to their house.

[Illustration]


V.

Then they whispered to each other,
"O delightful little brother,
What a lovely walk we've taken!
Let us dine on beans and bacon. "
So the Ducky and the leetle
Browny-Mousy and the Beetle
Dined, and danced upon their heads
Till they toddled to their beds.

[Illustration]

* * * * *




NONSENSE STORIES.


THE STORY OF THE FOUR LITTLE CHILDREN WHO WENT ROUND THE WORLD.

Once upon a time, a long while ago, there were four little people whose
names were

[Illustration]

VIOLET, SLINGSBY, GUY, and LIONEL;
and they all thought they should like to see the world. So they bought a
large boat to sail quite round the world by sea, and then they were to come
back on the other side by land. The boat was painted blue with green spots,
and the sail was yellow with red stripes: and, when they set off, they only
took a small Cat to steer and look after the boat, besides an elderly
Quangle-Wangle, who had to cook the dinner and make the tea; for which
purposes they took a large kettle.

[Illustration]

For the first ten days they sailed on beautifully, and found plenty to eat,
as there were lots of fish; and they had only to take them out of the sea
with a long spoon, when the Quangle-Wangle instantly cooked them; and the
Pussy-Cat was fed with the bones, with which she expressed herself pleased,
on the whole: so that all the party were very happy.

During the daytime, Violet chiefly occupied herself in putting salt water
into a churn; while her three brothers churned it violently, in the hope
that it would turn into butter, which it seldom if ever did; and in the
evening they all retired into the tea-kettle, where they all managed to
sleep very comfortably, while Pussy and the Quangle-Wangle managed the
boat.

[Illustration]

After a time, they saw some land at a distance; and, when they came to it,
they found it was an island made of water quite surrounded by earth.