No More Learning

Dundrige his issue hath; but is not styl'd,
For all his issue, father of one child.


553. WAY IN A CROWD.

Once on a Lord Mayor's Day, in Cheapside, when
Skulls could not well pass through that scum of men,
For quick despatch Skulls made no longer stay
Than but to breathe, and everyone gave way;
For, as he breathed, the people swore from thence
A fart flew out, or a sir-reverence.

_Sir-reverence_, "save-reverence," the word of apology used for the
indecency itself.


557. UPON ONE-EY'D BROOMSTED. EPIG.

Broomsted a lameness got by cold and beer:
And to the bath went, to be cured there:
His feet were helped, and left his crutch behind;
But home returned, as he went forth, half blind.


563. UPON SIBILLA.

With paste of almonds, Syb her hands doth scour;
Then gives it to the children to devour.
In cream she bathes her thighs, more soft than silk;
Then to the poor she freely gives the milk.


570. UPON TOOLY.
The eggs of pheasants wry-nosed Tooly sells,
But ne'er so much as licks the speckled shells:
Only, if one prove addled, that he eats
With superstition, as the cream of meats.
The cock and hen he feeds; but not a bone
He ever picked, as yet, of anyone.

_Superstition_, reverence.


573. UPON BLANCH. EPIG.

I have seen many maidens to have hair,
Both for their comely need and some to spare;
But Blanch has not so much upon her head
As to bind up her chaps when she is dead.


574. UPON UMBER.

Umber was painting of a lion fierce,
And, working it, by chance from Umber's erse
Flew out a crack, so mighty, that the fart,
As Umber states, did make his lion start.


579. UPON URLES.

Urles had the gout so, that he could not stand;
Then from his feet it shifted to his hand:
When 'twas in's feet, his charity was small;
Now 'tis in's hand, he gives no alms at all.


580. UPON FRANCK.

Franck ne'er wore silk she swears; but I reply,
She now wears silk to hide her blood-shot eye.