GERONTE:
Certainly
not.
World's Greatest Books - Volume 17 - Poetry and Drama
Why did I not study?
JACQUELINE: What a clever man he is!
SGANARELLE: Thus these vapours of which I speak
passing from the left side, where the liver is, to the right
side where the heart is, it happens that the lungs, which
we call in Latin _armyan_, having communication with the
brain, which in Greek we name _nasmus_, by means of the
_vena cava_, which we call in Hebrew _cubile_, in their way
meet the said vapours, which fill the ventricles of the
omoplata; and as the said vapours--be sure you understand
this argument, I beg you--and as these said vapours have
a certain malignancy--listen carefully to this, I pray you.
GERONTE: Yes.
SGANARELLE: Are gifted with a certain malignancy
which is caused--please pay attention----
GERONTE: I am doing so.
SGANARELLE: Which is caused by the acridity of the
humour engendered in the concavity of the diaphragm, it
happens that these vapours--_Ossabundus, nequezs, nequer,
potarinum, quipsa milus_. That is just what makes your
daughter dumb.
GERONTE: No one, doubtless, could argue better.
There is but one thing that puzzles me. It seems to me
that you place the heart and liver differently from where
they are; the heart is on the left side, and the liver on
the right.
SGANARELLE: Yes, that was so formerly; but we have
changed all that, and nowadays we practise medicine by
an entirely new method.
GERONTE: I did not know that. I must ask you to
pardon my ignorance.
SGANARELLE: There is no harm done. You are not
obliged to be as clever as we are.
GERONTE: Certainly not. But what do you think,
monsieur, ought to be done for this complaint?
SGANARELLE: My advice is that she should be put to
bed, and, for a remedy, you must see that she takes plenty
of bread soaked in wine.
GERONTE: Why so, monsieur?
SGANARELLE: Because in bread and wine mixed together
there is a sympathetic virtue which causes speech.
Don't you know that they give nothing else to parrots,
and that they learn to speak by being fed on this diet?
GERONTE: That is true. What a great man you are!
Quick, bring plenty of bread and wine.
SGANARELLE: I shall come back at night to see how
she is getting on.
GERONTE: Just wait a moment, please.
SGANARELLE: What do you want?
GERONTE: To give you your fee, monsieur.
SGANARELLE (_holding out his hand from under his
gown, while Geronte opens his purse_): I shall not take it,
monsieur.
GERONTE: I beseech you.
SGANARELLE: You are jesting.
JACQUELINE: What a clever man he is!
SGANARELLE: Thus these vapours of which I speak
passing from the left side, where the liver is, to the right
side where the heart is, it happens that the lungs, which
we call in Latin _armyan_, having communication with the
brain, which in Greek we name _nasmus_, by means of the
_vena cava_, which we call in Hebrew _cubile_, in their way
meet the said vapours, which fill the ventricles of the
omoplata; and as the said vapours--be sure you understand
this argument, I beg you--and as these said vapours have
a certain malignancy--listen carefully to this, I pray you.
GERONTE: Yes.
SGANARELLE: Are gifted with a certain malignancy
which is caused--please pay attention----
GERONTE: I am doing so.
SGANARELLE: Which is caused by the acridity of the
humour engendered in the concavity of the diaphragm, it
happens that these vapours--_Ossabundus, nequezs, nequer,
potarinum, quipsa milus_. That is just what makes your
daughter dumb.
GERONTE: No one, doubtless, could argue better.
There is but one thing that puzzles me. It seems to me
that you place the heart and liver differently from where
they are; the heart is on the left side, and the liver on
the right.
SGANARELLE: Yes, that was so formerly; but we have
changed all that, and nowadays we practise medicine by
an entirely new method.
GERONTE: I did not know that. I must ask you to
pardon my ignorance.
SGANARELLE: There is no harm done. You are not
obliged to be as clever as we are.
GERONTE: Certainly not. But what do you think,
monsieur, ought to be done for this complaint?
SGANARELLE: My advice is that she should be put to
bed, and, for a remedy, you must see that she takes plenty
of bread soaked in wine.
GERONTE: Why so, monsieur?
SGANARELLE: Because in bread and wine mixed together
there is a sympathetic virtue which causes speech.
Don't you know that they give nothing else to parrots,
and that they learn to speak by being fed on this diet?
GERONTE: That is true. What a great man you are!
Quick, bring plenty of bread and wine.
SGANARELLE: I shall come back at night to see how
she is getting on.
GERONTE: Just wait a moment, please.
SGANARELLE: What do you want?
GERONTE: To give you your fee, monsieur.
SGANARELLE (_holding out his hand from under his
gown, while Geronte opens his purse_): I shall not take it,
monsieur.
GERONTE: I beseech you.
SGANARELLE: You are jesting.
